No 'Search & Rescue' Members In This House

My boys can't find the mayo jar in the fridge, so the chances of them finding a small child in the 100 Acre Wood is slim to none. So, yep, marking that career off their list. They could, however, be Dog Trainers.  They've trained me well.  If I say, "Clean your room."  They know that if they pick up a sock...play XBox....put their pillow on the bed....shoot a nerf gun.....open the closet door....I'm going to march in, scream, "Forget it! Go outside!" and then clean the room for them.

Training is in their blood.

They're really, really good.

As infants, they would whine and I'd drop everything to come to them. No words necessary.

As toddlers, they could bust out a good cry and I'd scoop them up to the Nursery to avoid disturbing the congregation. Only problem was, they were smiling before I made it out the back door.

They've got this down.

So, today, as evidence proved a serious rubber band war goes on in my absence, I thought of our cleaning routine.  I tell them what to do. They do it. Next time. I tell them what to do. They do it.  When will they catch on for themselves? When will they notice the sock in the floor, the paper on the desk, the pizza under the bed?  When will they take the gumption to clean something because they want it clean?

I know the day will come. I saw it in my oldest son. His room was only clean after I'd made a visit in there and then suddenly, he would be vacuuming on his own time.  It takes a little bit of maturing and a little bit of getting sick of dirt. And before you know it- you find a  good guy where there was a grimy kid.

I think about their souls.  They read their Bible when I remind them...they pray with us because we always pray at meals, church time, bedtime, in crisis....they go to church because we load them up and go....they abstain from things because we don't allow them...they partake because we lead them.  When will they take the initiative on their own?  Have I stunted their spiritual cleaning by doing it all for them?

I pray not.

I pray I'm leading by example.  I mop with Pine Sol because I was taught. I wash with Dawn because I've seen it done.  I wash with Tide because Mom did.  I know bleach will whiten because Maw Maw said it would.  I find myself tapping my broom the way my Grandmother did.  But it in all, I've found what works. I've what doesn't...and I've made my own 'brand'.

I hear myself praying, and it is the voice of others' in my ears.  I raise my hands and I catch a glimpse of loved ones gone.  I know the truth is found in the Bible- because my Great Grandfather found it there.  Church is a comfort because my family has found it to be so.  The way I live, the standards I follow, the joy I feel in my soul....it is not done for me, as a Mother makes the bed for her child. It is buried deep, grown in a well-toiled heart of an honest child.  I know my convictions are true.  I pray that in spite of all the ways I pamper my boys, they will love the cleanliness of a Christian life and pursue their own path.  A path of Godliness and Holiness knowing that while they may have seen their Dad and I live it- they must embrace it themselves and become who God wants them to be. Live how God calls them to live. And work for God like nobody's business.

Who knows, with the amount of 'training' they have under their belts- they just might be the next greatest leaders of our time.

Sweeping and praying,
Sondra

Day 3

One of my cousins had a sweet little boy, so I painted a banner to welcome him into the world (and our family!)

Actually, I lost the material I bought to make him a carseat tent, so at midnight, I painted this adorable gumball machine to celebrate...my wish for his Mommy & Daddy is that he is as Sweet as a Candy Shoppe!

Welcome William Grayson!

Day 1

Happy New Year from Chance. 

Happy New Year

2011 was a year of change for us.  We learned how to live without our oldest son under our roof....we miss him but are SO proud of the husband he has become.  Of course, I never doubted he would be anything but a wonderful husband- he has an incredible example in his father.

Larry lost his job in January, but God kept us through a few months of unemployment.  During the New Year's weekend, God had prompted us that the upcoming year would be one of change.  We had been praying about a ministry in the area of Tuscaloosa for 5 years. This would be the year- but when?  After Larry lost his job, we felt the Lord's guidance to jump all in. God opened a job and sent us to work for Him, too.  The devastating tornado in April set us to work running full steam ahead.

 We haven't slowed down.  We are currently waiting on our home to sell and in the meantime are living in an apartment. While we are thankful for a roof over our head we are SO looking forward to a 'Manse' of our own.  The Preacher's Home, a place of peace, a place of hospitality....we can't wait to see what it will be like. Until then, I have purposed to make this apartment our home.
No matter how long it takes-(have I ever mentioned that patience is NOT one of my virtues?)

We have a precious group of people who worship with us at Refuge Holiness Tabernacle.  God has given us favor in our community and we are so grateful.  2012 only brings me hope. I am super excited when I think of what God is going to do.  He has promised us so much, and He is always faithful.

So, from the West home- HAPPY NEW YEAR!

It's not every day......

So I decided to blog more for a journal of sorts.....I'm gonna try.

We have recently moved into a two bedroom apartment temporarily while our house sells. We are learning a lot from this move. The most noticeable thing is that we have too much stuff, or rather, we HAD too much stuff. There are so many things we didn't bring here, knowing we wouldn't have room and I don't miss 'em. It is actually liberating. Now, there are things that we do miss and we will be getting quickly but I am more determined than ever to live minimally (if that is how you say it).

I have learned that I am more girly than I thought. I always considered myself the unfrilly type, and I am too an extent. Having three sons further led me to believe that I was a rough and tumble gal. NOT! We went camping with our best friends over the Fourth of July weekend. We had a wonderful time. The boys (they have two) made some awesome memories....they rode the Sea Doo, the bass boat, watched fireworks, played on the playground, swam, kayaked, caught minnows, learned how to work flint rocks (not my finest moment, there, oooops!) and rode bikes. I think that covers it besides the whole sleeping in a tent and cooking on coals part. They were in HEAVEN....I was so excited to take them since I have wonderful memories of camping with my own family as a child.

Apparently they were pretty good times.

It's ok with me if we start camper shopping. The tent thing is not for me.

Our besties were really roughing it- they stayed for four nights. (But I won't mention that they have a PORTABLE AIR CONDITIONER...that should be outlawed....especially if they don't share with their fellow campsite people.

Anyway. I loved being with them and all our kids were there so it was a great experience. But I know that I am a little more girly than I thought. I was a little disappointed at this, but I'm coming to grips with it.

The next weekend, we took the kids to DeSoto Caverns. An amazing display of God's handiwork. I was really shocked at it and especially shocked that I have lived in Alabama my entire life and never gone there. I am making a list of things to do in Alabama and my boys will do them before they are grown. It is my new goal. While at Desoto Caverns, we enjoyed some really cute games. The kids had a great time and it wasn't too expensive. Always a winner in my book.

This week, Jordan stayed with us two nights. It is always a treat to have our 'boy' with us. We love him and miss him when he isn't with us. We went to the Museum of Natural History on the campus of the University of Alabama. It was a neat little museum and the boys really liked it. Peyton and Jordan expressed how much they liked it several times. Gavin thinks he remembers a story that one of his teachers who has passed away told him about a fossil there. All three said it was neat....so I'll give it two thumbs up. Definitely worth the $5.00 it cost us to enter. This evening, we went to Tannehill State Park. We met Christiane, Heidi and Ruby there. Casey & Larry joined us when they got off work. We grilled and the boys fished. Great lazy evening....while we were eating, a doe walked right up to our campsite! Heidi said, "Well, it's not every day you do that!" I smiled at her and thought, every day with you is amazing...but in our effort to keep things 'normal', I refrained. I did think momentarily to the day almost 3 years ago when I saw those four sweet kids walking down the hall to the chapel and I wondered if I would ever see much of them again. These lazy days make me so very thankful that God blessed Larry & I and we are able to spend a lot of time with them. God is SO GOOD! Yes, Heidi, it's not everyday that something like this happens!

-Sondra

Saturday, my cousin got married. He married a wonderful, sweet girl and that in itself may be a whole blog altogether. (I'm SO proud of him!) Clint is my cousin on my Dad's side. Both sides of my family are actually very close and I know that is unusual, but it is really special to me. My Mother and her only sister married brothers- so for years ALL of my cousins were Singletons. That is one reason why my families are close...there are other reasons, but they are complicated! We live in a small town so large families in small towns make for many common friends. My Dad came from a family of 13 siblings. They were very spread out and my youngest aunt has nephews and nieces that are older than her. They are a funny, talkative bunch and somehow our children get into the craziest predicaments. Needless to say, we have a lot of fun whenever we are together. My Mom came from a family of 4, two girls & two boys. We have been very blessed and I love my family dearly.

My Dad's Mother was Bessie. She was country born and bred. Ma Bessie, as we called her, was one of those people who was the same no matter where you saw her. I don't know if she knew that Eleanor Roosevelt said that no one could make you feel inferior without your consent, but that was her motto. She was just as likely to tell the Sheriff off as she was the criminal. (And that may or may not have happened.) She grew up poor, and raised her children by the skin of their teeth- but they were her kids and they were just as good as yours. On the other hand, all children at her house were fair game. If her kids got in trouble, yours did, too. I was a grandchild and have witnessed grandchildren and their friends get a swat from the flyflap or a house shoe! There were always lots of kids to play with and something to get in to at Ma Bessie's. With that being said, my Dad often told me that growing up you didn't come home late. You didn't come home at all or came in early because a late arrival meant you wouldn't have a bed. There were always extra children at the Singleton home. Ma Bessie was always befriending the underdog. If someone didn't have family- they were at our family reunion. I have attended many family functions, Christmas get togethers, Easter, etc. where there was a mysterious person present. Sometimes we found out who they were by the end of they day and sometimes you didn't- but you had better offer them something to eat! I suppose I'll never forget when my cousin Pam was bringing her fiance, Todd, up to meet us all for the first time. Todd was from a well-known family in Mobile and we were all told to be on our best behavior that day. Nothing could happen to run Todd off because Pam was really crazy about him. We walked in Ma Bessie's house and she was sitting in a chair between the kitchen and the living room. She loved this perch because she could see both doors and keep an eye on what was going on. We all said hello and chatted and began wondering where Todd was. About the time we were about to ask- we got out answer. Out came Todd from the back porch with a screw driver in his hand. Ma Bessie was grinning. Todd walked up to her and said, "The screen is fixed. Is there anything else you need?" We all stared wide eyed. Had Todd really just fixed the back screen door on his FIRST visit to Chatom? My Dad did his deep sigh and walked outside, some of the sisters poked at each other grinning. "Mama!" one of the girls exclaimed after Todd walked on out the front door to find Pam, "why did you make him work!" "He walked in and asked if he could do anything and it was broke," she stated matter-of-factly. I ran outside with a few cousins and we all agreed that Todd might come back, but he wouldn't be asking if there was anything that needed to be done, especially if she was cooking chitlins. We had learned that a long time ago ourselves. (Todd is still in the family, by the way.)

But that was how she was. When she passed away, close to a thousand people showed their respects....and the crowd ran the gamut from lawyers to the unemployed. Most of them had eaten at her table and another good number had gotten a spanking by her, but they took time out of their day to say goodbye.

She had many grandchildren that were not born into our family, but she claimed them and treated us all the same. I never heard her call any of them her step-grandchildren. When she married my grandfather, he had 3 children whom she raised as her own. She never called them her step children, either. While she never had a heart to heart and talked to me about this, I took this in. I learned from her example and I am so glad. I would miss out on so much in my future had I not witnessed first hand this kind of total acceptance of anyone who is not blood related. My Dad had brought an army friend up to hunt and fish when they were in their early twenties. Johnny Duggar liked it so much he bought land and built a cabin in the woods of Washington County. Since my Dad referred to his fellow Green Beret as 'Duggar', everyone else did, too. Us kids called him Uncle Duggar, because you had to 'put a handle on' any adults name. Around my aunt Renee's table as we were making the official list for the survivors in Ma Bessie's obituary, I remember several cousins who were in their late teens realize that 'uncle Duggar' didn't share their blood. But we all know that blood doesn't make the family, so he's safe. He wasn't listed in the paper, but he sat in the reserved section.

My maternal grandmother, Jean, has the most loving heart. She has taken care of more elderly people than anyone I know, buying their groceries for them or taking them their medicine. She worked for years in the lunchroom at our public school. If we had every dollar that she gave to a needy child- we'd be rich. No one knows how many kids she helped in her years of working, but she made many children feel special as they walked through the lunch line. Maw Maw Jean likes for us to all be together at the holidays. She loves it when we are all in one place and she hates to think of someone 'not having no where to go.' There have often been extra people at our Thanksgiving or Christmas Eve gatherings, because Maw Maw doesn't want anyone to eat alone. She calls me often to ask about people and worries about those who don't have family nearby. When I was growing up, it was very common for several of my Dad's brothers or sisters to come by to visit with my Maw Maw Jean. She had watched them all grow up and enjoyed hearing about their families. When my Ma Bessie passed away, my Maw Maw became a second Mom to many of them. Thus, I was not surprised when I found out that my cousin, Clint, had asked Maw Maw to stand in as his grandmother on his wedding day.

So, there I was, at my paternal cousin's wedding, watching my maternal grandmother be escorted in. I smiled as I watched her. I thought of what a wonderful thing is was that even though my grandmothers were very different, I was so blessed that they both taught me the same principle. They showed me in different ways that blood wasn't nearly as important as we believed. Through their lives, I know that you can and should love others no matter their background or circumstances. It has been a vital lesson to me in the ministry, but even more so in my own home. I have a child that I didn't birth, but I sometimes forget which one. I have a daughter in law that I love as my own and I am so thankful that I can.

This is the gift that my Grandmothers gave to me.

I pray I pass it on.

TRUST

Last December, our sweet son proposed to a wonderful girl (whom we already consider our daughter) and we began planning a wedding...Not just any wedding- THE WEDDING. I love weddings, I love planning, I love having something to look forward to. So, we began. Christiane's Mom was a dear friend of mine, and we had often talked of our childrens' weddings. Of course, we didn't know they would be marrying each other! Neat how the Lord works things like that out. I had always lamented the fact that I had no daughter, and therefore, would not get to "DO" a wedding. I often joked that all I had to do was buy a ham for rehearsal and we were ready! Well.......fast forward to 2010 and I found myself getting to 'DO' a wedding. Yay! Christiane knew just what she wanted...well, kinda. She wanted a Christmas Wedding. Snow. Royal Blue. Winter Wonderland.Lots of "WOW!" Christiane and Casey's favorite time of year is Christmas. They love the food, the music, the weather and the family-time. They wanted their Day to be just like that- Christmas Dinner, Christmas Music, Snow and everyone they love to be right there with them. Larry and I promised them that we would help them financially and we would WORK OUR SELVES TO DEATH! And that is just what we did.

Christiane and Casey worked so hard....they planned...they saved....they sacraficed. And in the end-they had the Perfect Day!

In January, we sat down and made a plan of things we wanted to do. Things we HAD to have, things we wanted and things that were options. We made lists, looked through pictures and prayed. Larry and I both felt that God asked us to not go into debt for the wedding. We asked Casey and Christiane to do the same. Of course, they were free to do whatever they wanted, but we encouraged them to stay debt free. I told them how great of a blessing it would be to begin their lives with no debt. We really had not idea how that was going to work, but we agreed. I worked as much as I could to add to the Wedding Kitty. I thought that a job would be the answer. Apparantly, the Lord thought otherwise. I promised Him that I would work as if the Wedding was my job, in an attempt to save money-'earn' my wages by being the Brides' Slave. =)

While praying, I said a phrase that I often say. "Lord, help me to trust You."
I instantly felt the Lord ask me, "What if one of your children needed help trusting you?"

whoa.

I cried.

I cried.

I repented.

I promised Him that I trusted Him.

I changed the way I prayed.

I began praying and telling the Lord that I trusted Him. I know that He knows our hearts better than we do- but I wanted Him to know. Everytime I would pray, instead of begging Him for whatever I needed, I told Him how much I trusted that He would do the right thing would provide in whatever way He saw fit.

He met our needs every time....but not always in the ways I thought....imagine that.

The two main expenses that we had promised were the photographer and the caterer. The Caterer, who happened to be friends of ours, didn't want to tell us a price until they actually 'worked'. We understood, as they didn't want to overcharge, but it made it the day of the wedding before we knew the total. So on Saturday, Larry makes our final withdrawal from our Savings Account. He reminds me that if they need more than that, we will have to get it from our personal savings. Ok...."TRUST"

I suppose you know that when the night was over, we had the exact amount needed. We laid our heads down and owed no one A DIME! We are so thankful. The Lord provided through using others. We had so many wonderful people donate things and many, many family and friends just helped. It was amazing. It was heart warming. It showed us that there are good people in this world. Our Christian family is a WONDERFUL family to be a part of. It taught me a very personal lesson in trust.

God CAN be trusted...and I am forever thankful.